- Tell someone that you have separated to establish the separation date.
- Decide where you are going to live in the interim.
- Understand the impact of moving out if you are seeking full or half-time custody of your children.
- Be realistic on how much time you can devote to your children. Example: If you work on evening shifts is it realistic to have full custody of your children?
- Understand that you will have to pay child support (if not in a full-time or shared custody arrangement) and learn to accept this fact with grace.
- Learn what part of the separation triggers your anger and get control of that trigger.
- Understand the tactics and games played by your ex-spouse to trigger your anger, get revenge, attempt to discredit you and better their position in court.
- Realize the importance of gathering documents before leaving and the importance of taking heirlooms, favourite possessions, photos, etc. when you leave. You may not have a second chance to get what you want.
- Understand the impact of your spouse’s income, education, work history on your requirement to pay spousal support.
- Accept that you will need support both emotionally and legally at this time of your life.
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